Indonesian Bedtime Stories

So when I first arrived in Jogja back in June, I thought I'd be extra diligent and make sure that I did everything to get my Indonesian up to scratch. So I was damn fucking on la. Went to buy Indonesian childrens' books cos I thought I could practice on them. Thing is, my Indonesian at the time was so fucked up that I couldn't even read Tom & Jerry comics in Indonesian so I just chucked them aside and forgot about them.

Now that I've just moved into my new apartment which, because its now the holy week of Lebaran and nobody goes in to work, is without TV/internet/radio/cheap prostitutes, etc. So as I was looking for something I could use to slit my wrists (I don't have any knives either), I found one of these books and started reading. And I tell you this is one fucking bad ass childrens' book man.

It's called "30 Dongeng Sebelum Tidur Untuk Anak Muslim" or "30 Bedtime Stories for Muslim Children". The wording on the cover is nice and friendly with big words in different pastel colours. So I was flipping through it when I saw this picture:

Apparently its for a story called "Zunairah Yang Teguh Dan Tabah" or "Zunairah Who Is Firm and Resolute". O-kay.. So the story is about this Arab dude called Abu Jabal who had this slave called Zunairah who was like damn pretty and served him very well and all. Then one day she decided to convert to Islam but cos Abu Jabal's more of a pagan kind of guy, he gets really pissed off and tries to order her to go back to praying to his pagan gods. And when she refuses, he like punishes her. And then the book goes on to describe in graphic detail how he ripped off her blouse and lashed her back with a big whip. Then there's a description of how the whip was like damn painful and there were like bleeding welts on her back but then she was like resolute in her faith, so she took the torture. And then the book tells in detail how this went on for several days, until her lips were like dry and bleeding but still she would not renounce her faith cos she was like damn strong and resolute. And finally the torture was so hard that it causes her to go blind. But then because God had mercy on her, so the next time the guy tortures her, the pain somehow causes the nerves in her eyes to be reconnected and she can see again. Finally some Muslim dude buys her out of her misery.

Excellent bedtime reading.

And then there's the other story with the title "Hukum Mesti Ditegakkan" or "The Law Must be Enforced" (the titles, by the way, are written in cute, friendly fonts). In this story, some chick comes to the house of some Umar bin Khathab guy to tell him that his son, Abu Salmah, had like premarital sex with her (apparently, the Indonesian word for that is "zinah") and got her pregnant. Umar is like furious with his son and questions Abu Salmah, who promptly admits that he has "sinned" and will accept his due punishment. So Umar turns from furious to proud that his son actually had the balls to admit that he slept with this girl and got her pregnant. But the Law must be upheld so Umar tells his people to tie up Abu Salmah and, guess what? Has him WHIPPED. Woohoo!!

There's even a nice picture:

AND then there's the other one about the king who lost a battle and was tortured by his enemies by being boiled alive in an earthenware pot. Excellent stuff. I can imagine a typical bedtime scene here. Mom says, "Kids, time for bed, let mommy tuck you in and read you a nice little bedtime story. Hmmm.. what shall we read tonight? How about '30 Bedtime Stories for Muslim Children'?" The kids go, "Yay!! I wanna hear the one about the unfaithful wife who slept with another guy and then got whipped and gutted before being burned alive by her husband! Please Mommy pleeeaase??..."

And I wondered why people here are weird.