"Come come ah boy, no need to scared. Auntie got only one leg, give you half price."
It's fucking awesome. Everything I want to see in a movie. Zombies, police, army, guns, sexy girls, Osama Bin Laden, lesbians, sex, gogo dancers, zombies, sexy girls, etc.
Directed by Robert Rodriguez (all those Eurasian people all very arty one), its bundled together with Quentin Tarantino's Death Proof in a double feature called Grindhouse.
Aiyah. anyway, the story goes something like this:
There is this demented army lieutenent dude who is doing some bad evil scheme thing with some scientist when BAM! Some cock up makes this super jiat lat deadly chemical get released which makes people become crazed zombies who want to eat human flesh. So the police and army come in with their big guns and all but cannot stop the zombies.
So they all hide out in some place where for some reason some lesbians will make out but there's this super hot gogo dancer girl called Cherry whose leg gets bitten off by one of the zombies. So she limps all the way back to the safehouse where some doctor attaches a table leg to her leg stump.
Then there's the intermission where the demented lieutenant dude explains how this whole thing came about because he killed Osama Bin Laden but Osama infected them with the zombie chemical. Whatever. End of intermission.
Then the best part: Cherry decides that her table leg leg is too kok already so she replaces it with an M4A1 CARBINE ASSAULT RIFLE WITH M203 GRENADE LAUNCHER!! Then when the zombies come, she just get down on all fours but she lift up her leg like a dog gonna pang jio like that and LET THE MOTHERFUCKERS EAT HOT LEAD AND HIGH EXPLOSIVE M203 GRENADE ROUNDS!!! DRRrrRrrRrrRRRR!!! BOM BOM BOM BOM!!! DIE MOTHERFUCKING UGLY ZOMBIES!!! CHIBABOOOM!!!
Check it out, I never bluff you:
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Armalite's latest incarnation of the M4 Carbine, blow up doll butt stock version.
Anyway, I'm totally gonna go buy the pirated DVD this weekend.
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